Friday 7 January 2011

Even more Social work.

Now, we had been told that Social Worker was near knackered from all the stones turned over to find young man somewhere to go. I had after all been promised a phone call today to tell me all


I did manage to glean one little snippet though placements were unaware he needed to be moved, no one contacted them till yesterday. There is NOWHERE for him to go - period, it's us or nothing.

Well no there is always the agencies only one of whom would take him and that would cost about 1000 pounds a week So we have saved them rather a lot already. Dumping him here for a month has also moved him a month closer to his 16th when he can be palmed off somewhere and as he is not in education and he would be keen to oblige by kicking off every time they did something that was not exactly what he wanted it would not be too long before they could shrug their shoulders, walk off and say he "will not work with them".

I can see the plan being, keep him here as long as possible and pray he gets to 16 before he is moved. It's depressing really.

Of course the Social Worker did not call, then again he might have been worried at what we would have said to him. Our link worker shared an incident report with him. 

Laddo came to us with a reputation for being a flailing seething maelstrom of destruction when he loses his temper. We have avoided any real nasties till this morning, when he objected to us making noise getting the other young people to school and college. Things got really heated and he uttered the phrase "say one more word and I will ******* kick your head in"

Had I gone away and left him it would have been a very bad message, one that he has used before, let him have his way  or he will get violent.   
 
You can never give in to terrorism so there was only one response:

"one more word"

There was a tremendous crash in his room the door was flung open and he exploded out of it.

He threw himself at me, then when I neither flinched not moved he stopped dead. It takes a bit of doing but you have to develop a flat affect showing neither fear nor aggression in your face or your body language.

He didn't know what to do, so he did nothing.
 
In the adrenalin drop of post temper emotion we did a lot of good work with him about what he is, who he is and should he not be his real self not this aggressive behaviour. A lot of really positive stuff about who the real person is inside his head, separating him from how he acts.  

It is a very important thing to do, once you show the person you like them but have a problem with how they chose to behave you are well on the way to helping them change.

I think I can see where it is coming from, this young man has been hurt, then hurt, then hurt again. He is drawing back inside himself to protect himself.   It's all front. He really needs someone very skilled to work with him and help him make sense of the world and life.

And he is 16 in 4 months.

Bloody hell, some poor sod will have their work cut out.

Doing a proper job would cost a fortune, so they will probably hide for as long as possible
 and abandon him here.

Out of sight and most definitely out of mind.

Mind you there are times I think I must be out of my mind to do this job....

But as for him being some kind of one man war, people must not have lived much, on my foster carers scale of 0-10 where 0 is peace and 10 is damn lively, he registered about 2. 

R

2 comments:

gz said...

He is lucky he is with you

You mean there's more??? said...

Lucky?

Jury out....

His social worker might be getting some though.

R